He gave an answer that was more practiced than the one he had given me, because he had thought about it more by then. He talked about the picture of providing, about his father, about the way his family talked about work.
Dr. Watts said: “And how did it feel to watch Rachel lead the workshop?”
He thought about it. “Proud,” he said. “And embarrassed. Both at the same time.”
“What were you proud of?”
“She was — she was really good. She was in control of the room. The things she was saying made sense and you could see people getting it.”
“And embarrassed why?”
“Because I’d been describing her to everyone as someone who wasn’t working. And the room full of my colleagues was getting more context on my wife’s career than I had given my own family.”
“That’s an interesting way to put it,” Dr. Watts said. “More context than you had given your own family. Did you choose that word deliberately?”
“What word?”
“Given.”
He thought about it. “No. But I think it’s accurate. I chose what I gave them.”
“Yes,” she said. “You did.”
I appreciated the way she let that sit. She did not add commentary. She let him hear what he had said.
## Three Months Later: What Changed and What Didn’t
I want to be honest here. I am not going to tell you that everything was fixed in three months. That would be a different kind of story, and not a true one.