“I know she’s scared,” I said. “I’m not angry at her for being scared. I’m — I’m hurt. And I’m also in a contractual situation that I need to manage.”
“You’re really not going to pay the balance.”
“Mom, I’m not going to pay for a wedding I’m not invited to. That’s not –” I stopped. Started again. “I need you to actually think about what you’re asking me to do. I’m supposed to write a check for more than seven thousand dollars for an event where I’ve been told I have the wrong energy and the day will go better without me. What does that look like to you?”
A long pause.
“It looks like something that shouldn’t have happened in the first place,” she finally said.
“Right.”
“I’m not saying you’re wrong. I’m saying I don’t know how to fix it.”
“I don’t think you need to fix it,” I said. “Claire needs to fix it. And if she can’t or won’t, then she and Owen need to figure out the venue finances, and I need to be released from the contract, and the wedding can still happen.”
My mother was quiet for a moment. Then she said something I didn’t expect.
“I haven’t always made it easy for you to be taken care of in this family.”
I didn’t know what to say to that.
“You were the one I leaned on after your father. And I think I kept leaning because it was — because it was easier to keep leaning than to figure out how to be the one holding things up. And Claire learned from that. She learned that you were the one who handled things. And I think that’s been hard for you in ways I haven’t let myself see.”